𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝘁 𝗥𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀?

 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝘁 𝗥𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗹𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀?

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🔷Early in life, especially early in my career, I had difficulty accepting compliments.

 

🔷For example, after some successful task or project, a boss or colleague may have told me what a great job I did on whatever we were working on. I usually shook them off through some self-effacing comment which I perceived as being humble, or I would quickly change the subject as these situations made me uncomfortable.

 

💡It wasn't until mid-way through my career that a wise mentor of mine noticed my behavior and explained that what I was doing was not viewed as being humble but more than likely came across as false humility. Moreover, the situation I so desperately tried to get myself out of, now probably made the person who extended the compliment feel confused as I just negated their offering of support.

 

🌟I learned that I may be doing more harm than good whenever I downplay or reject a compliment. A compliment is, after all, a kind of gift, and turning down a gift insults the person giving it, suggesting that you don't value them as highly as they value you.

 

👇Here are a few tips that I have learned along the way that assist with healthily receiving compliments and ensures the offeror of a compliment walks away feeling good about the interaction:

 

𝗕𝗲 𝗔𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲: While receiving a compliment, simply listen to every word they say and try to understand the meaning. 

 

𝗞𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗥𝗲𝗹𝗮𝘅𝗲𝗱: It will make you, as well as others, feel better.

 

𝗦𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗲: A smile is our best feature! Always receive a compliment with a gracious smile!

 

𝗕𝗲 𝗠𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗳𝘂𝗹 𝗼𝗳 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗡𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗲𝗿𝗯𝗮𝗹 𝗕𝗲𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗼𝗿: Watch your body language as you accept the compliment. Avoid crossed arms, downcast eyes, or overly-casual postures that can send a wrong message or indicate disinterest.

 

𝗔𝗰𝗰𝗲𝗽𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲: Believe when someone compliments you! Arguing or denial might end in insulting or hurting the giver’s feelings. It may sound like you are contradicting them, or they don't have a decent judgment. Simply accept and believe when somebody praises you!

 

𝗠𝗮𝗴𝗶𝗰 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀: Magic words always work in any situation. Always follow compliments with magic words like 'Happy to know that,' 'That really means a lot,' 'Thank you,' 'I am happy that you simply noticed, ''Good to listen to this,' etc.

 

💫I still sometimes catch myself resorting to self-deprecating humor when receiving a compliment. Hard habit to break! Still, I usually remember these tips quickly to ensure I appreciate the moment and don't ruin the kind actions of others!

 

💫Additionally, I try to offer the same sage advice my mentor gave me all those years ago when I observe a colleague, team member, or mentee routinely making the same mistake I made!

 

💫And I find that once comfortable with receiving compliments, we are more encouraged to GIVE more compliments to others!